Well I wasn’t going to blog anytime soon as I don’t usually like to blog when I have a lot of complaining to do. But I think that may be a while and I would hate to leave you all guessing what’s going on with me. So here’s the deal, I did my blood work on Friday and everything went up all be it minimally it went up none the less so I went on my retreat. I didn’t hear from my Dr. so I took that as an OK go to the retreat. Well the Friday late afternoon was fine until I was ready to go and socialize with all the other women, my tummy decided it had other plans so you can guess where I ended up. If you guessed the toilet bowl then give yourself a gold star. Later that night I went and took some medicine that settled my tummy and helped me sleep.
Saturday was much better, it was hot I chilled with God, listened to a great speaker and received lots of prayer…shit didn’t hit the fan until I got home Sunday. I could hardly move my hands without wincing in pain. God forbid I have to make a fist because that was borderline excruciating. Well I made it through until Monday when I went back to the hospital for more blood work ---pin cushion---my levels had gone back down again. YAY (sarcasm) now what? Still waiting. Bigger problems, now my stupid knees are killing me. They hurt when I walk they hurt when I sit they hurt when they stay in one position for a short period of time. Maybe I have cancer in my bones. That’s all I can think of. How can I not???? It’s a logical assumption. Paranoid? Yup. Everytime something hurts for no apparent reason I think, What if it’s more cancer? Im told that is a very normal fear with people with cancer. So it’s now Friday May 10 and my fists, knees and total body skin and muscles still feel messed up. THIS SUCKS!!!!! I am in so much pain all the time and im almost finding it hard to see the good in all this, I know it’s there, I know God is going to use this but it sure would make it a lot easier to handle if I knew why the pain had to continue. I am supposed to have an MRI within the next 4 weeks and see my specialist on June 4 for the results.
This morning I went to see my GP and she looked up this type of chemo I’ve been on and apparently I don’t have bone cancer. All these lovely side effects are part of the chemo. Talk about a package deal, boy did I ever score pretty well on that one. See what bargain shopping does for you?! Get what you pay for.
So now there’s more blood work and I got a phone call this morning that my dates have been changed to MRI May 18 and specialist apt. May 22. I’m glad it’s closer because I want to know what’s going on because I would really like to go to Toronto before I return to work but my body (especially my knees) have to be in good form to fly and I still don’t know what the chemo plan with me will be yet. All to be revealed May 22.
So unless anything major happens between now and then please keep praying as I try to move from feeling mentally, physically and yes, almost spiritually drained to the happy yet sarcastic Mel again.
Thanks for all your on going prayers. When all is said and done at the end of the day, God is still God.
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